January 2009 of James extremely close to 5, Sydney 7 years
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January 3, 2009
James tends to be quite aware of what language he and others are speaking. Sydney has the tendency to use English words, especially when she's telling a story about something she's excited about, and just string them together using little Portuguese words. So she said, "Eu gosto muito de swim e de ir pra parties e de play no computer." ("I like to swim and go to parties and play on the computer.") James heard this and said (in Portuguese to me), "Everything Sydney likes is in English."
I mentioned something about what we'd done over Thanksgiving. There is an expression for Thanksgiving "Dia de Acao de Gracas" but it's not an exact translation b/c it doesn't have the whold pilgrim meaning it has here. When I'm being a stickler, I'll use the Portuguese expression, but while I was talking to him, I used it in English. He was really quick to point out, "Mamae, you're speaking English!"
January 5, 2009
Today I heard a Mexican friend who speaks Portuguese to her kids (the father is Brazilian) use the expression "Eu te amo" instead of "Eu te adoro." I thought "amar" was more like the romantic love. She said, "no, it feels closer." She told me that one of the complainers she works with was nearly indignant that my friend didn't say to her children "I love you" in her native tongue (Spanish, of course). Apparently, said complainer went on and on about how that would be bad for the child. My friend explained that she told her daughter she loved her from her heart, that the language didn't matter. What a wonderful way to put it.
January 6, 2009
I've been frustrated of late because I've noticed a pattern with Sydney's Portuguese. She speaks less of it after Stella's been here. What's up with that? I just don't understand. I probably didn't handle it well, but when she started these sentences that only had the linking words (at, and, then) in Portuugese and the big words in English, I'd correct her with, (in Portuguese of course) "Wait wait, in Portuguese so..." and I"d let her retell what she'd just said. The toughest part is that I want her to know I'm interested in the content of what she says, not just the language.
Sydney's really into French. She's forever coming up with a word or expression to try out on me. So far so good, but she'll surpass me in French in no time at all.
January 8, 2009
James came up with a sneaky little way to be understood by me by still using English. He asked me how fast I can go on the road. I said the car could probably get up to 100 miles per gallon and that Daddy's would be higher. That wasn't what he was asking apparently and he explained what he wanted to know. I think I understood that time: he wanted to know how fast you were allowed to go on the roads (speed limits). So I told him but he still had doubts about whether or not I understood. So he said, "Eu vou falar pra Daddy, 'How fast can you drive on the road?'" ("I'm gonna say to Daddy, 'How fast can you drive on the road?").
I hope this doesn't become a general trend. It's always a bit strained when we're quoting someone who speaks English. Sydney and I especially love to use the accents and motions/manerisms of the speaker when telling a story about a daily occurance. It's tough to do that in translation. I do it. I can tell it's hard for the kids so if they speak in English for the quotation part, I just act appropriately and then repeat it in Portuguese, subtly, not like a correction, more like a statement in Portuugese restating what she said and laughing or looking surprized of whatever is appropriate.
January 8, 2009
A rebellion has begun. The kids are getting cheeky about speaking Portuguese. I've initiated "peep". I say it when they say something in English and they have to say it in Portuguese before they go on. I've also tried to give Sydney the skill of making a context for a word you can't remember. So she couldn't remember the word for "cake" and I 'peeped' and she said she couldn't remember. I paused for awhile and she asked for help. I said, "Eu quero como o ________" (I want to eat the ___________) so that there would be Portuugese around the word which can switch ya over to the other language. It worked.
January 10, 2009
It's been interesting Sydney's interest of late in reading in Portuguese. She pulled out the old cards we used over a year ago (when she was 4 I believe) and wants to play games with them then write them in her little black composition book.
Stella gave me a great tip in teaching them to read. In Portuguese, consonants change their sound depending on what vowel follows them. So kids in school in Brazil learn
le
li
la
lo
lu
Then they move on to more difficult consonants. "T" for example makes the sound "ch" when it comes before the "ee" sound.
te
ti (prounced "chee")
ta
to
tu
Sydney really got into this. She's somehow scared though, of actually reading a book. She won't even concentrate on the words on the page because she already feels she can't do it.
January 19, 2009
Today is Martin Luther King, Jr Day and tomorrow we inauguate the first African American president of the United States. It's an odd time to be struggling with a problem.
Sydney had a friend named Nekayla. She's been over for a playdate. She calls Sydney often and is just generally one of Sydney's pals. But this weekend Sydney went to her birthday party. She lives very near here in the most economically depressed area of the town. Stepen dropped her off and noticed her reticence. It wasn't the "controlled birthday environment" she was used to. She didn't know anyone. Most were family members. Stephen took her and said there were heaps of people in a very small house. Stephen left because the party was for 2 hours. When I saw her after the party and asked if she'd had fun, she shook her head no and looked so sad. I asked why. She said she was the only person who wasn't black. It made me want to cry.
Apparently upon arrival, Sydney gave Nekayla her present and instead of putting it away with the other gifts, she immediately broke into it and started playing with it. This upset Sydney somewhat (I think because it just didn't fit her idea of how to do presents at a birthday). Sydney also said there wasn't even one activity, just the cake. She's used to pin the tail on something-or-other or a pinata. She said there was nothing to do, that the kids were sort of ordered outside where it was really cold. "I didn't understand their games."
She also said the people were mean and scary. That the grandmother was yelling at a boy saying that if he touched the icing on the cake, she was going to slap him. Sydney said, "And this was a FOUR YEAR OLD boy!"
So she was out of her element and uncomfortable. We discussed how different people communicate differently. We said that if she's ever at a party and someone seems isolated, that she knows how it feels and could help that person come into the group. It just made me so sad because you try to made a difference in how your kids view race so that progress can be made. And then you feel horrible to have left her in a situation that scared her. I would never put her safety in jeapardy in order to open her mind to new people and situations and was frankly a bit worried that Stephen didn't stay with her. His reason for going made sense though. He said the situation was safe and that if he stayed, she would have just been clinging to him the whole time. So many hard decisions for parents. I want to promote peace. I want to teach that we are different but the same.
